I'd like to thank my ....

No, Malcolm can't quite manage it. It's the fuss about finding a backless, strapless couture dress in his size.

However, he is indeed deeply honoured to be number five in Iain Dale's list of Irish Blogs (and one ahead of the far more assiduous, informative and deserving Mark Devenport of the BBC). Dale's blogspot, which Malcolm has castigated from time to time, is by a country mile the most acceptable Toryism available, and tells it how it is. It makes the others (ConservativeHome, for one obvious instance) look humourless, narrow, griping and mealy-mouthed.

The list is headed, quite properly, by the estimable Slugger O'Toole, without whom no Malcolm morning (afternoon or evening) is complete. Slugger's onlie true begetter, Mick Fealty, should be instantly listed as a national (which nation, however?) treasure.

What is even more peculiar is that Malcolm pontificates on purely Irish topics only a few times a month. He resolves to do better in future. Sphere: Related Content