Things one wishes had gone unsaid (number 992)

The BBC reports:

A Briton has died following flash floods on the Portuguese island of Madeira, the Foreign Office has said.
At least 40 people have been killed in the floods, and more than 120 others hurt - a "small number" British.

The accompanying video is pretty spectacular too:

This should be compared with page vi of the Retirement Special supplement to today's Sunday Times property porn supplement:

Madeira ... retains a genteel, Edwardian air ... this is still a haven of rhododendron bushes and golf courses, with a wonderful year-round climate: a real plus. Its hilly topography is a minus.

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