Friday, June 6, 2008


Malcolm's classical education means that, half-a-century on, he has brain-cells imprinted with useless knowledge like:
fero, ferre, tuli, latum.
If you weren't there, don't bother about it.

Other paradigms are better known in the modern world, and more relevant:
I like an occasional drink; you're a bit of a boozer; he's a right dipso.
Equally, no modern "-ology" is complete without a set of paradigms:
We have presently three paradigms of depression: the psychoanalytic, the cognitive-behavioral, and the biological.
Their function is to render the topic impenetrable to all outside the select circle of intimates.

These thoughts come together in Malcolm's re-evaluation of the female psyche.

He came to the conclusion that the feminine mind allows of just three pronouns:
"I", which means exactly what it says;
"We", which means "you", as in "We need to shift that wardrobe"; and
"She", which invariably translates as "that bitch down the road."
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